The BHDM works in all kinds of situations, not just dating. I just applied the technique to a text dialog with an online physical therapy provider who has some pretty good PT videos out there. So I contacted him regarding setting up a consultation. Here's what I got:
- Directives and Command Language (Telling me the next steps. Disregarding my questions with more commands.)
- Bombastic Syntax - A shower of promises of what "his team" could do for me while only responding dismissively to my presenting issues. ("Oh, we see that a lot." He never asked basics like my age or sex.)
- "Fitness Bro" and "I'm the Prize." Surprisingly well physiqued for a doctor (as he claims to be). He makes this the visual focal point of his videos rather than his experience or credentials.
In short, what's he's claiming online (individualized treatment protocol) is not what he's really offering, (one size fits all, probably pre-recorded.)
In another non-dating vein, my UU church had a ministerial candidate who set off so many red flags when he spoke during our service, that I had to restrain myself. Then, being a "Very Busy Man," he requested an emergency board meeting to demand he be kept in the communication loop. I'm on the board and when he spoke he raised even more red flags, some of which I confronted him about directly. It's not "dating," but he is courting the favor of our congregation. I'm thinking, UU's should see through this fluffery, but some of our board members were indeed taken in by his charismatic display.
BHDM - Power BS detector for all manner of courtship and interpersonal relations.
Watched this video, thought of this group and book. We need them.
Humanitarian aid worker tells women to avoid men at all costs during civil unrest (or disasters, or poverty, or any situation where there's an opportunity really)
The BHDM works in all kinds of situations, not just dating. I just applied the technique to a text dialog with an online physical therapy provider who has some pretty good PT videos out there. So I contacted him regarding setting up a consultation. Here's what I got:
- Directives and Command Language (Telling me the next steps. Disregarding my questions with more commands.)
- Bombastic Syntax - A shower of promises of what "his team" could do for me while only responding dismissively to my presenting issues. ("Oh, we see that a lot." He never asked basics like my age or sex.)
- "Fitness Bro" and "I'm the Prize." Surprisingly well physiqued for a doctor (as he claims to be). He makes this the visual focal point of his videos rather than his experience or credentials.
In short, what's he's claiming online (individualized treatment protocol) is not what he's really offering, (one size fits all, probably pre-recorded.)
In another non-dating vein, my UU church had a ministerial candidate who set off so many red flags when he spoke during our service, that I had to restrain myself. Then, being a "Very Busy Man," he requested an emergency board meeting to demand he be kept in the communication loop. I'm on the board and when he spoke he raised even more red flags, some of which I confronted him about directly. It's not "dating," but he is courting the favor of our congregation. I'm thinking, UU's should see through this fluffery, but some of our board members were indeed taken in by his charismatic display.
BHDM - Power BS detector for all manner of courtship and interpersonal relations.
It’s brilliant! I highly recommend it whether you’re dating or not it’s absolute gold.
Just bought the e-book! I can't wait to read it. I've learned so much from the group, Instagram and here already. Thank you again for all you do. 🔥
Watched this video, thought of this group and book. We need them.
Humanitarian aid worker tells women to avoid men at all costs during civil unrest (or disasters, or poverty, or any situation where there's an opportunity really)
https://youtu.be/bc0I41pGfuw?is=Ja4dj_a3PjCRh1Qo
Thank you for posting ❤️
Super excited - I just started listening to the audiobook. Looking forward to getting wiser!